Time of Reflection

The last year has been full of obstacles and difficulties that have really opened my eyes to how God really works. Often times we question God about, why tough things in life need to happen if He's the sovereign God of all things. This morning I had a moment to read my Bible and reflect on what it means for me; I came across Jesus teaching to his disciples in Matthew 5:1-12. Every verse starts with blessed from verse 3 to verse 11. “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God. Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me” (NIV). It's never easy to hear, “It's okay, God has a plan” or “don't worry God's in control” when your in the middle of and obstacle or difficulty. The real truth is, even though your life just feels like a wreck right now if you stick to what God has planned for you or what you feel He's been leading you to do, then you will experience the blessings of God in inconceivable ways. If you've followed my blogs at all then you know I've been trying to record some of the ways God has blessed us (my family), but in all actuality I've only been able to describe and capture a small glimpse of the things we've been able to experience and learn. My hope is that, if you are going through a tough time you will stop, check and see if you are doing what God ask, try to recognize the blessings of God, and “press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:14).

I Had a Bad Day

Woke up late, 2 year old crying because mom and dad won't let her play (poke and prod) with her 12 week old sister in her cradle, can't find belt, lunches not ready, late for work, late for school, van needs gas (gaslight on for past 3 days), left daycare check at home, walk late into class and the professor prays and then welcomes the class in his usual English accent. He begins class with, “Is God good Class? Is God good in your life? Can anyone share how God is good to them?” It's a small class, but it's not long and stories of how God has helped students get their car fixed, humbled them by using them, given peace and hope in memory of brothers drowning (alive today because he was revived at hospital), kept healthy through 3 severe car accidents in less than 6 months, and provided for a family through a new job. It's at this point of course when it hits me that I'm not having a bad day. I begin to think of all the things God has done in my life over the past year. I begin to think about how God is good all the time. He doesn't have any obligation to be, but he is. I often think about how God did enough when he forgave my sin. It's now that I begin to think and notice that not only did he forgive me and that was enough, but he is continuously good. It's true that if God blesses me in no other way than forgiving me of my sins that would be enough to declare him good at all times. The catch is this, God is doing more than that, he is exceeding in a way that goes beyond what has already seemed impossible.

Blessings

Please read the previous blog post (Blessings Intro) before reading this blog.

When we started this journey a little over a year ago we knew life wasn't going to be easy, but we had no idea about all of the obstacles that we would face. All we knew was that we were going to sell our house and move to Springfield, MO so that I could go to Baptist Bible College. It was stressful trying to sell our house, quitting secure jobs, and leaving family behind. As tough, frustrating and even as heartbreaking as it was at times we've never been so close to God and never have we learned more about God's character than through theses circumstances. There were points where we asked ourselves many questions: Would we have to try and pay a mortgage on a house that we didn't live in miles away?, Would we have to give our dog away to someone we didn't know?, Where would we live in Springfield?, Who would be able to watch our daughter during the day?, What would we do if something happened to our car?, Will we be able to get jobs in Springfield?, Will we have enough money to make it this month or the next or the next?, Will this gas get us to pay day? and many other questions like these. After all of these questions we talked with each other and decided that the answers didn’t matter…We knew that pursuing God like we never had before was something that we needed to do! Like I mentioned in my previous blog I don't believe that everything always works out and we didn’t just start making a bunch of bad decisions to sell our house for a loss in a tough market, leave good jobs and family because we thought everything would work out perfectly; the honest and CRAZY thing is that we came to the point where we didn’t care what this situation did to us or for us. The best part is that even through the major trials we have faced this past year, God has blessed us tremendously. There were many times when it would have been easier to quit and just go home but we are determined to fulfill the desire that God has place upon our hearts; The desire to show people how much the God of the universe love them. We have been able to experience God in ways we would never have been able to if we were still living our comfortable lives in our nice home, with our nice jobs and with our family not too far away. God knows more about suffering than anyone else and it is our firm belief that he will meet, comfort and fellowship with you there. In hindsight we can see the blessings and “God experiences” started before we even left Kansas City and have continued.

Here are a few of the great GOD moments we have been a part of: We did sell our house, family and friends did volunteer to help with the painting and fixing of things that go along with selling a home, people helped us move (twice), our family even agreed to take care of our dog while we were gone or at least until we found a place that accepted pets, Once we moved we soon found out that there would be daycare available for while I was in class and we could live on campus with all utilities paid in an very affordable apartment, Avanti got a job after applying for months the day before school started, when money was about to run out again our home church asked us to come and share a quick testimony and while we were there they gave us a check just to show their appreciation and show that God blesses you when you act in faith, multiple times people from our home church have sought out our families and would give them money to forward to us (I can say without a doubt that without the financial support from our family and church family during this time we wouldn’t have been able to make basic trips to the grocery store.), there were even times where family members would leave money on a table or behind the medicine cabinet mirror when they came to visit, one of the most surprising gifts we received was right around January when our car needed some repairs and we had no way of paying for it a check from our home church showed up in the mail for the amount we needed to fix the car, we have found a church in Springfield that we enjoy and are were able to start serving right away, through the church we have been blessed with new good friends and the opportunity to work with students!

I could go on and on with examples of how God has surprised us and blessed us this past year; When we stop and reflect it is overwhelming to think that none of this had to happen this way and it could have been much more difficult. I am obviously not saying that things have been ultra smooth or without any problems, but we feel blessed and excited to see how God has moved in our lives. I want our friends, our family, and our church family to know how great of an impact they've had in our lives over the past year. I wish I could explain what it feels like when your prayer is answered (the way you would have hoped) or the gratitude you feel when a check from someone shows up in the mail just as you need it, or you receive a phone call from your parents saying some kid at church gave them money to give to you. We are so grateful for the friends, family, and church family that we have. There have been times when we've had no other choice, but to ask ourselves, “Is this really what we are supposed to be doing?” After looking at the last year we can answer without a shadow of a doubt. “Yes!”

Blessings Intro

I've been trying to think of something new to write about for awhile now, but I don't want to write about the same things over and over again. I probably would be okay with this if what I felt compelled to write about was something other than the blessings in my life. I am the last person in the world who would write about how blessed his life is. Not because I am not blessed, but the contrary, I am extremely blessed. I just don't believe that everything is always going to work out perfectly or I don't believe that if things don't work out it's because we don't have enough faith in God. In chapter 11 of Hebrews there is quite the list of people who had great faith and followed God's plan. However if we look at verses 36 through 38 we see what some of them faced and I would venture to say most of us would not consider these things blessings. Verses 36 through 38 says, Some faced jeers and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment. They were put to death by stoning; they were sawed in two; they were killed by the sword. They went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated— the world was not worthy of them. They wandered in deserts and mountains, living in caves and in holes in the ground. It's pretty clear then that if we follow God's plan for our lives we won't always escape death, become powerful, be wealthy, or conquer all evil that comes our way. Faith in God does not equal a life free from suffering. We even find Paul in Acts 14:22 returning to the places he went during his first missionary journey and teaching the new disciples, “...We must go through many hardships to enter the kingdom of God...” This life of following Jesus is not about convenience. When Jesus entered the world it wasn't for convenience. Mary wasn't convenience d when she first found out she would be pregnant, Joseph wasn't convenience d when he found out his wife to be was having a child, Herod wasn't convenience d that a new king was going to be born, and on and on. Jesus' life was not about the convenience of mankind. Don't get me wrong there are a lot of things throughout Jesus' birth, life, and death that we can take comfort in, but he didn't come, live, and die for us to live a convenient worry free life. We must ask ourselves, Did Jesus die a humiliating death for the life I am living today? With all that being said I feel compelled to write about some of the ways God has blessed my family and me over the last year, so don't be surprised if you see repetitive post or what seems like the same things over and over again.

Yahweh Jireh

We had just got done buying more groceries than normal. For a couple of reasons really. Reason one, we had just received several gift cards over the holidays from family and friends and were able to pick up some of the items we would normally skip over to save a few bucks. Reason two, it was just one of those weeks that you just need everything from food to the usual personal hygienic items. We live on the second floor at our apartment complex, so as I parked the car I began to realize just how much effort it was going to take to get everything in plus our 2 year old daughter. First I grabbed our daughter and ran her upstairs so that I could go back down quickly and get everything inside as efficiently as possible. I then had to make about 3 trips to get everything from the car to our apartment. I should probably add that it was very cold outside, and that obviously made things even worse. As I was making my last trip up one of the sacks tore and boxes of cereal, cheese its, graham crackers, and a box of brownie mix (item normally skipped) went crashing to the ground. Already frustrated from making so many trips up and down the stairs in the cold I was a little upset. My hands were full carrying many other sacks and I had to lay everything down and re-bag some things so that I could get everything upstairs without making another trip or leaving boxes of food on the sidewalk. As I was picking things up enraged in anger it hit me. I was upset because I was making to many trips, that I had to go in and out of the cold, and that there was too many things put into one bag. As soon as I made it upstairs I told my wife exactly what had happened and she kind of chuckled. You know the chuckle you do when someone you love and adore trips a little or a sack of groceries rips when the have their hands full. I wanted her to get it to, so I interrupted her laughter. I said, “don't you get it.” I then realized by the look in her eye that she got it alright and that she was not just laughing at me because I dropped some groceries with my hands full, but that I was upset because we had too many groceries. We both stopped putting things away and just stood and thanked God for providing for us once again. Yahweh Jireh or “The Lord Will Provide.” This is the name used to describe God in the Bible when God provides for Abraham a substitute sacrifice for his son Isaac. In Genesis 22 God challenges Abraham follow him in faith and at the last moment God provides. Abraham acknowledges God as a provider by naming the place he was at as. “The Lord Will Provide.” For my wife and I 2 nights ago we in our minds acknowledged God as a provider and have named this place “The Lord Will Provide.”